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You cant tell me I aint Officially a Fat girl!
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10:37 p.m. on July 30, 2005 Man the fund raiser was HELL. I was attacked by flies, I broke out in a massive sweat. I didnt do anything My grandma just wanted me there. For some reason she keep bringing up Dyin. Like she make comments like "all I gotta do is sit here and wait for the lord to come get me" Im like mannnnn c'mon! So besides that and my Uncle with no teeth and a speech impediment trying to scream out HOT DOG! COKE! I was bored outta my mind. It was absolutly by far one of the worst 4 hours I ever had to spend out side surrounded by flies. In other news the other day when I took them pics of my braids; I took one of the pics and put it as my yahoo icon pic. I got a IM from Cuddles saying "you sure take a lot of pics, you should get a job doing that" I started to tell him "You should get a job kissin my ass" I didnt say it but I thought it. I be tryna me nice. Before that when I had that other job and they didnt want me after 2 days, he IMed me sayin "You cant keep a job for nothin" I didnt even reply back to him. I dont know if my feelings was hurt or the fact that he dont know what the hell I do, all the interviews all the job searching to get a job. When you work for a temp agency thats what it is a TEMP job smh. Im not really mad Im just annoyed that he makin these comments like he really know whats up. I could see if I was one of them stay-at-home-watching-tv-and-eatin-all-day-drinkin-koolaid-type broads. Its cool though I aint gone trip. My depression will be over soon enough. Im starting to revert to "back in tha day" When niggas wasnt shit, all they was good for was layin tha dick. If they didnt do that right they got kicked to the crub like street booty. Im feeling like that right now. I dont wanna hang out, with them , go out to eat, movies, cuddle, I dont wanna do that shit. I just feel like these MFer's cant do shit for me that I cant do for my self. There fore what is their purpose? Hell they cant even fuck me.... I have TOYZ Bitch! with C batteries! Holler!!! I found my self learning about myself on accident. I was just thinkin like man Im Ebonie. I cant be nobody but me. What other people think of me shouldnt sway my opinions, my actions, or the words that come out of my mouth. Thats what makes me different, Thats what makes me stand out. I aint scared to say what I feel and mean what I say. Im learning to be comfortible in my own skin. I dont compare myself to other people. Its like some kinda impowerment when you feel your confidence is at a all time high. Even in all my fatness.... Speaking of my Fatness. I weighted myself for the first time in 9 months this morning. Im the past 9 months I have gained 48lbs from the 60 I lost last Feb. I look at the scale and it said TO BE CONTINUED... I weigh 241 lbs!!!! You cant tell me Im not Officially a FAT Girl! Blackanese told me "Its not how much you weigh its how you wear it" Ok some what true because I dont look like Im damn near 300lbs. But I have noticed I went from a size 14 to a 18-20. Good thing Im evenly porportioned or Id be fucked up. So of corse today I starved myself. When you only 69 lbs from being 300lbs you kinda go into that FOOD IS BAD mode. SO bottle water it is. Breakfast Lunch Dinner. I dont have kids. I have no excuse for being fat. So as I sit here im thinking...Yeah which diet works best Bilimia or Anorexia? Decisions Decisions. Ill probably get back on Atkins only problem with that is I was constipated for a whole fuckin year! When you eatin meat and vegs with no carbs your shit is HARD as fuck. I say Carb are good. I was on Atkins and had to fuckin take metamucil and, pacillium husk just to go to the bathroom Not to mention the tubs of prepH. That was the bad part about being sexy and trim a bitch was always constipated! This is some bullshit. There has gotta be anothe way. Im thinkin Anorexia might be a better choice. Ill take some pics of my fatness and Disect my self later to futher prove how fat I am. toodles
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Hello Readers, Thanks for coming to my blog. I expect lot's of comments! I have had this blog since 2003, and sometimes I wonder why I started it. Everything I write here is from my personal experience; things I find interesting, and my personal opinions on what's going on in the world. If you are offended easily this is not the blog for you. You are welcome to stay as long as you like as long as you respect my personal space. Don't make me act "ethnic". That will be all.